November 2, 2008

The 'Tweener Stage of Life

Recently I have found myself in what I refer to as a “tweener” spot. Normally this term is used for those not quite human beings we call pre-teens, but in my own life, I find myself between the major life steps. I am done with grad school and have about five years of work experience under my belt. I consider myself pretty successful at life thus far. What I do not currently have, much to the disgrace of some of my friends, is a guy.

I recently went to a bachelorette party where I found myself the only non-engaged non-married girl in the group. Which as it turns out, is my own personal version of hell since apparently all that group of girls could talk about was weddings, marriage, and babies. Oh, and did I mention that the bride-to-be asked all her other friends if they knew of anyone for me to date? Say it with me. H-E-L-L.

What I realized throughout the night is how much I appreciate another group of friends I have. The ones who accept me and love me regardless of if I have a date or not. The ones that don’t hassle me about guys and realize that I have to go about life in my own heidi-like way. I was feeling frustrated that the two girls at this party that I thought of as really good friends, somehow thought that I was lacking or unhappy because I wasn’t seeing anybody.

What I wanted them to understand was that someday, I probably will get married. In the meantime, I don’t find my life lacking for much due to the lack of a guy. It is okay that I don’t have a date because I don’t want to settle for the crazies that they all want to introduce me to. What I don’t enjoy is the feeling like they are almost embarrassed that they still have a single girl friend. It is okay that I am single. I’m happy with life and shouldn’t that be the most important thing?

Seeing my two friends, who I don’t get to visit with often, wasn’t quite the reunion I was hoping for. What it made me realize though, was how great my current primary group of friends are. My guy friends who never question my lack of a date, my couple friends who always invite me to be the third wheel and wouldn’t have it any other way, and the group as a whole that is supportive of each others personal life decisions, whether we agree with them or not. That is friendship.

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