April 15, 2009

Bangs, bangs, grow away . . .

I have a picture of me when I was about three years old in a beautiful blue dress with ruffles, holding a Mickey Mouse doll, with the classic little girl hair cut. You probably know the hair cut I’m talking about because almost every little girl out there has had it. Shoulder length hair, cut straight across, with bangs. It was, and still is, the cutest little girl hair cut there is. Over the years my hair cut changed of course, however fifteen years later, I still had the damn bangs.

About the time I was in junior high, I got very sick of my bangs and wanted to grow them out. The problem with growing out bangs is that it is a long and awkward process. A person has to be comfortable going through some funny hair stages to do it. And in junior high, I was the kid who got picked on for everything and anything so I was not about to go and add funny hair to the list.

In high school, I was still sick of the bangs. What do you do with them when you play sports? I lacked the confidence to just pull them back and besides, you’re not allowed to wear anything hard, such as barrettes or bobby pins, in your hair for games anyway. The problem with bangs is that they sit right on your forehead, which lets face it, when you’re working out, tends to get sweaty. So now not only do you have bangs in the way, you have sweaty bangs, which is not hot.

By the time my senior year of high school rolled around, I decided the time had come. I was fully prepared to grow out my bangs. I had the self-confidence to make it through the awkward stages. What I didn’t realize was that growing out your bangs is one of the most painful things a girl can grow through. There’s the stage where they get to long to curl and are in your eyes. For games, since barrettes were banned, I would have to start a French braid at my forehead. And yes, this does make you look like a dinosaur. Then you hit the stage where they almost, but not quite, go behind your ear. You hit a point where you can stop using them as bangs and actually comb them with the rest of your hair, even though they are usually only half the length of the rest of your hair. Finally, your “bangs” hit chin length and beyond, and all is right with the world again. The whole process took 9-12 months and was not the best experience I’ve ever had. I was just glad to finally be part of the rest of the adult world – a world with no bangs.

Then a few years ago, bangs came back in style. WTF. I had done all this work growing the damn things out and now they were “in?” I vowed that I would not cut bangs again having been through the grow out experience once already. Then about a year ago, I got bored with life. I like to refer to this as my quarter life crisis. I had some work experience under my belt, had finished my graduate degree, and was trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. So I did what any normal girl does – I took out my internal crisis on my hair. My hair got shorter, changed color, and then last August . . . you guessed it, I cut some bangs.

In my defense, these weren’t the bangs of my youth. These were fun and flirty side swept bangs. Now, three hair styles and four hair colors later, I’m very tired of the bangs and they, along with the rest of my hair, are back in the grow out phase. And once again, they almost go behind my ear. Forget water boarding, this is how to torture people. The good thing about growing out bangs at this age is that I am more than willing to stick bobby pins and barrettes in my hair to keep it out of my face, regardless of how ridiculous it looks.

So here I am, 10 year after the original grow out, doing it again. I’d like to think I learned my lesson for the second time, but I’m guessing the next time I have a life “crisis” the hair will once again take the brunt of it. How many times will it take before the lesson really sinks in? I guess only time will tell. In the meantime, where the hell did I put that bobby pin?

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